paralyzed pwb0581 Paul bundren

I feel like I am blacking out 

I am spazzing out

I think I am shell shocked in disbelief 

So many things happening so fast 

And unexpectedly beyond control 

I am not really sure how I feel about it 

It feels like there is a lot of things that are being passed around 

It is getting harder to tell what is real anymore

There is a lot of dread

A lot of false high hopes 

It sort of feels like I am paralyzed 

And it doesn't seem like there is a way to wake up from this 

The unexpected has become the new norm

Will there even be a tomorrow 

strained pwb0581 Paul bundren

Lately things have been strained 

There were some things that I would have liked to do 

There was things that I would have liked to build and create 

But I couldn't see things getting in the way 

i guess that it wasn't meant to be 

I don't know if I can be able to keep the promises that I made back so long ago 

Time has gone by 

Everything has changed 

And things have shifted 

We are not the same people anymore 

And things have become unrecognizable 

There are some things that you are into that I am not 

And some things that I am into that you are not 

It looks like we are not compatible 

And everyone is absent 

We are at a non agreement 

Consent is everything 

And can be backed out of at any time 

It can't be forced or manipulated 

It has to be an agreement with everyone involved 

Not a one way street 

It has been harder to find the light in the darkness

Just wish I could find somebody someone to help me through this 

Is there anything out there for me

In a world full of craziness and confusion 

Is there any way to simplify things 

Why must everything be so complicated 

Why does it feel like I am on my own in this

And walking alone 

Things don't seem right and are not making sense 

I hate to leave things on bad terms 

But Sometimes things are beyond repair 

And not worth fixing 

Sometimes it is better to walk away 

driven pwb0581 Paul bundren

My latest episode may send me to the psych ward

They may say that I lost my mind 

That I am crazy 

But I feel like you made me 

I am a product of my environment 

I feel like I have been driven here

This can't be undone

It is burned forever in my memory 

Now I am dealing with the aftermath 

Of what you created 

Things running through my head I can't understand to this day 

I felt like I got tricked manipulated and used 

You put me here 

Why can't you fix this

You leave me behind 

Dealing with the mess you made 

I hope I don't end up like you 

With all of your hate

But the rage is driving me insane 

I need to leave this place 

And never come back 

Why is everything so creepy crawling back in my head again it feels like I can't escape 

It feels like your voice is still in my head screaming at me 

It feels hard to block it out 

self care pwb0581 Paul bundren

Self care and self love I feel is not a bad thing 

The world may be dark cold and grey

But stay true to yourself 

Never lose who you are due to someone else's coldness 

Never let them see you sweat 

Never let them see you fold under pressure 

Sometimes it is ok to take a step back 

And respect your boundaries 

You don't have to change who you are for the likes of someone else 

cutthroat pwb0581 Paul bundren

It feels like Someone turned things from easy into a 100 in a blink of an eye 

The environment has turned hostile cuz of hate

Lifelines are gone 

Pickens are getting slim

It is complete chaos 

We are losing our homes

And digging through garage cans 

Not that sanitary 

What ever happened to love 

We are now living in induced misery 

The fire is freezing 

The drive that we once had had stalled 

This isn't the American dream that I grew up hearing about 

You can no longer afford to survive 

The rich want it all and want it now 

The fortune the fame the power 

And leave us scavenging for what is left 

Unfortunately it seems to be everyone for themselves and people are taking each other out one by one 

Does everything have to be a competition 

Does everything have to be a game 

Does everything have to be a race against time 

It feels like everyone is emotionally drained 

And checked out including myself 

Is the prize even worth the pain endured

clean pwb0581 Paul bundren

How do I get clean again 

I feel like I have been off track 

For far too long 

How can I be myself again 

I feel like I have been going under 

How do I find my way 

Through so many twisted paths

I feel like there is so much going on 

It is hard to understand and process all of it 

One wrong move can cost me everything

How do I get my hands clean again 

I think I drawn a line in the sand

It feels like there is no coming back from 

Can't change mistakes made in the past can only try to avoid them in the future

Is it too late to make amends

How do I get clean 

It feels like things are stained 

Permanently tarnished 

Can't go back to the way things used to be 

when a heart breaks pwb0581 Paul bundren

This is not a storybook romance 

More like a disastrous nightmare 

This is hard but 

When a heart breaks 

Sometimes it doesn't break clean 

More like scattered tiny little pieces 

On the floor that can't be glued together 

I know we intended this to be a long term commitment but I think I want to back out of this 

anymore this feels forced and not consensual 

This isn't what either of us want 

This isn't what I am looking for 

And I want out of this

Sorry if I sound cold 

But I feel like this is not right for me 

I want to end this for all and not go forward 

No I do not want to start over again 

I don't want to repair this 

I don't want to fix this anymore 

I think I am through 

No more playing games 

I think I just want this to be over for good this time 

I know that this will mess with my head

And be hard to get over 

When heart breaks 

It doesn't break clean 

dead pwb0581 Paul bundren

I feel so lifeless and scared 

I don't feel like myself anymore 

It feels like people want me to react and respond to things on a little or no notice that I know nothing about and I am feeling vulnerable 

Don't really know where to turn to

It feels like I am being pointed in a lot of different directions and I feel lost 

Things feel like they have been dead for so long 

Can you please bring some life into me

Why is everything so forsaken 

It feels like we are starting on hollow ground

And the environment has become unstable 

Don't know where we stand 

When everything is changing 

I feel like there is a lot going on 

It is hard to understand and process all of this

There is a lot of chaos and confusion

I don't want to jump into something that I don't know anything about 

And be a fool or an idiot 

I would like to make educated decisions rather than emotional quick responses 

And doing something I will regret 

It is getting harder to tell what is true

When there is a lot of fakery going on 

Am I even sure that I want to buy what you are trying to sell me what is the benefits and what is the cons and is it genuine 

Things are getting harder to recognize what is real 

Why does it feel like I stand on my own 

And nobody agrees 

And we stand divided 

Is there any hope 

The feeling I get is almost like I am drowning

withdrawn pwb0581 Paul bundren

If was to leave who would notice

Who would care 

I feel like I am in the middle of a party that I wasn't invited to and I don't belong here 

I feel withdrawn

Like my soul has left my body 

I feel like my mind is racing 

So many new things being thrown at me 

That I don't understand 

Things are not slowing down actually speeding up out of control 

I do feel like a fish dead out of water sometimes out of my element 

Out of my comfort zone 

Like a deer caught in headlights 

Things are not getting any simpler 

I try to pretend and act like I am forever young

Be a kid at heart and try to keep good spirits 

But it reality it feels like I am dying 

I don't want this to be my swan song 

But nothing can last forever 

Sometimes you got to know when to fold em

And let go 

calm down pwb0581 Paul bundren

I am not a robot 

I am not a machine 

I do have feelings 

Whether or not people care

Sometimes I feel like shutting down and letting go of everything 

What is more important 

What I am putting out and giving or my health 

When being put in a situation where you are being sabotaged I don't think your best interest are in mind and the relationship is not healthy and I feel like it is probably time to end it 

Please don't tell me to calm down when everything is going on so fast speeding up all of a sudden and there is a lot of chaos and I am trying to process it 

Please don't tell me to calm down and be quiet 

After being hyper and on high alert over what has been going on 

Feeling like I am being pushed over the edge 

Please don't tell me to wait and stand by 

While being set up to fall 

I heard from somewhere that you were talking to other people and that I was just a scapegoat that I was only a back up option when your side jobs fail it makes me wonder if you ever gave a fuck about me or just using me all along 

I don't think want to continue anymore 

I think I am done 

get lost pwb0581 Paul bundren

I know what I want to do 

I have already picked my side 

Stop trying to hijack my mind 

You already had your share 

Now you want mine 

Why don't you get lost 

You sore loser

My money 

My body 

My mind 

Is not your personal property 

Why don't you get lost 

You sore loser 

You are a liar

And mad cause you didn't get your way 

I am not a puppet 

I am not a slave 

I don't work for free 

And you don't own me 

I don't want to buy whatever you are trying to pass on to me 

I am not taking your drugs 

I am not willing to be manipulated and controlled by you 

Why don't you back off and get lost 

You sore loser 

burned out pwb0581 Paul bundren

I feel like I have become burned out

Paranoid And Less trusting 

It feels like some people are trying to push me over the edge

Things seem to be getting dark and ugly 

I feel like a deer in headlights 

Can't help to stop and stare

It feels like a loss of control 

We are seeing different sides of everyone 

Got to look at everything with caution 

These days it is getting harder to tell who to trust 

What is real

What is truth or fiction 

What is changing or getting erased 

Sad to say 

Alliances are fracturing 

Can't tell who is my friend or my foe

What have I been missing 

It feels like I have been blind 

Got to constantly be paying attention 

It feels like my back is against the wall 

I feel confused 

Can't tell what is real or how I feel anymore 

I try to be cool with people and get stepped on 

It feels like everyone losses 

In God's game and we are all pawns 

Was this part of the plan 

For the world to end

no hero pwb0581 Paul bundren

I feel partially emotionally checked out Don't know why I stay trying to keep my cool under pressure 

There is a lot of things going on at once 

It doesn't seem to be time to slow down and stop to think 

I don't know which direction we are going 

But It doesn't seem to be heading in the right way 

We are back seat passengers strapped in 

It feels like we are being driven under 

In the ground 

No one is really doing anything 

So nothing really changes 

I am not sure if I can abide to it anymore 

I feel like shifting gears 

And parting ways and jumping ship

Sometimes goodbye is the only way 

I try to be careful 

But you can never be too safe

Trying not to put all my eggs in one basket 

At one time 

Do I show all my cards to an enemy 

there is a lot of things happening 

That i feel is beyond my control 

I would be lying to say that I didn't care

But I am not able to fix everything 

I am no hero 

Sometimes it is better to let things the way they lay and walk away than to try to change things 

I'm Trying to choose between going with the devil you know or going with the unknown 

These days it is getting harder to trust 

It feels like every word and action feels like an attack 

Keep all eyes open at all times 

Even at the back of your head 

If you are going to shoot 

At least go for the kill

Just please make this as quick and painless as possible 

I feel like the damage has been done and is irreversible 

Nothing will ever be as good as they were

Nothing will ever be the same again 

Crying over spilled milk won't put it back in the bottle 

Each day feels like walking on another landmine 

It almost feels like I am being set up to fall

Who really wins

Didn't know that life was a game or a race

Why can't we love each other and help each other 

Rather than waging wars

Does everything have to be a competition 

What ever happened to compassion and respect 

It seems like that is gone

 

miles apart pwb0581 Paul bundren

It feels like we are so close but miles apart 

I don't know if this is real or only a dream 

Am I making a wish on a falling star 

I never really felt any significant love or connection before 

Sometimes I feel like this is almost too good to be true like this is make believe 

Do I go with my heart 

Or do I go with my gut 

I think I should let you know that 

I have been abused cheated 

Lied to and scammed and ghosted before 

Trying not to fall in the same traps

Sometimes it feels like I keep tripping over myself again and again 

Making incorrect choices 

Is there anyone out there that is right for me 

I keep searching for something that seems hard to find 

Are you hiding in plain sight 

And have been right under my nose the whole time 

I put myself out there for the world to see 

But I can't make you like me 

I can't make you mine if you don't want me

It sometimes feels like things are cold 

Were things ever alive 

Can't tell if there is a connection 

Even though we are close together 

It feels like we are miles apart 

It kind of feels like I am walking this journey alone 

opening statement 2026 pwb0581 Paul bundren

This might be controversial and might lose friends over this but I feel like I need to say something I normally try to stay quiet and keep my mouth shut but there is so much going on this country that is bothering me I could say so much about how I feel about the government but don't really want to be a target for bullies there is so much going on most of the time I try to stay out of it but things are concerning they are going after poor people and minorities taking away our jobs replacing them with ai and robots and raising the price of everything including the rent and kicking us out on the street broke and hungry I feel like the person running this country right now is an evil mad man and not fit and should be removed from power I feel like most politicians only care for themselves and could care less about the rest of the American people especially if you are different or poor or disabled and you are not a straight or white or Christian they send ice to rip away families orphaning and arresting children and invading homes killing citizens and we are losing freedoms they want to try to take over Greenland which would probably end NATO and cause world war 3 no one will trust us or help us ever again after we betrayed our alliances we are all getting played by the government especially the president I feel like we need to wake up the alarms are ringing but does my voice or vote even matter I feel like I am just a dot in this world being swept under the rug you look away just like poverty and homelessness i feel like we are not looking for a solution only adding to the problem who is going to stand up to this It is downright scary and frightening